Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
