There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
