found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Randomize
