Define "chronic" masturbator.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
