I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
