My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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