My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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