He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize