I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
