Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
