Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry BlinkBoy182 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(718): View more from New York

Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.

Fav 3 2427 873
share tweet
(502): View more from Kentucky

She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.

Fav 36 5028 1331
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.

Fav 7 4567 1149
share tweet
(561): View more from Florida

i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.

Fav 17 13080 1322
share tweet
(928): View more from Arizona

This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.

Fav 15 1384 3919
share tweet
(843): View more from South Carolina

Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.

Fav 1 2222 1153
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(541): View more from Oregon

Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?

Fav 7 4147 1231
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods

Fav 0 617 454
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(708): View more from Illinois

Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"

Fav 1 281 163
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT