i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
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