Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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