i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
