laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I came so hard my ears popped.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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