I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
