I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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