planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
