Those balls look pretty dangerous.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
