Are we in a gay sports bar?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
