so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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