he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Randomize