I skipped work to stalk him.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
