Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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