Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Randomize
