Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
