Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
