is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
