the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
