Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
