You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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