look no pants
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
