it's like iHOP with fire
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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