why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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