I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
it was like eating out sand paper
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I could fuck to npr.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize