Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
