Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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