I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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