I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
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