i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
