What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
