Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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