I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I just want to make out with him forever
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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