there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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