I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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