well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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