idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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