lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize