I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
