We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
