Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
