I don't think brook has ever known best
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
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